Tuesday, 22 July 2014


Back in somewhere in the early noughties, while doing the Friends & Family parties, I had fucked up light bulb moment! I decided I would do an outdoor version of the party. That idea may not sound ground breaking to most people, but to attempt an outdoor club night in the wettest city of the wettest country in Europe was pretty fukin radical Gee! 

Times were grim and we hadn’t had a summer for 4 years for fucks sake! I found a nice outdoor space at the back of a bar called Kro and booked a bunch of local vinyl collectors and record shop workers to DJ. As the day of the event got nearer it rained every day until the night before, then, miraculously, it was dry and warm for the party and then the following day it pissed it down. I had been blessed. (The Gods love a trier eh!) 

Over the next ten years I would do umpteen more BBQ parties eventually morphing it into the Red Laser BBQ as the record label started and to reflect my changing musical tastes. The change obviously wasn’t for some old schoolers who had indulged in Funk, Jazz and Hip Hop in its Friends and Family form but for others the exciting sounds of Italo, Boogie and generally good types of house music made the event fresh and new.

Then, early this year, I tried to book my usual Kro Bar and got the knock back from the venue. WHAAATTT!!!! The venue owners blamed it on problems with noise complaints from the Church next door (We always had to turn the music down for Sunday mass from 5pm – 6pm and pay the Vicar in liquor the piss head) and the crowd not drinking enough booze from the bar so the venue could make up their promo costs. The venue’s promo costs you say??!! Yes a venue that paid a promoter to put the event on not the other way round. Could you believe my luck?. I had been on a top screw for 8 years as the venue paid for the sound and the promotion to the tune of a grand. When finally another set of promoters asked to do a BBQ (Taxin my fukin idea AND venue) my financial screw became untangled as the new crew let the cat outa the bag the turds! You can imagine them askin the owner how much did HE want for the hire of the venue and then the owner scratchin his head like “What? You pay me? But I’ve been payin Woody for 8 fukin years!!” 

But everything happens for a reason eh!! Just as I was deciding to knock it on the head I was chattin to Randy Marsh of Wet Play and he had an idea for something similar with local boogie crew and music lovers The Social Service. The Social crew had been the offered an amazing new venue in a brewery on the outskirts of Manchester city centre in Salford (Even better it’s in the land of my birth) called The First Chop Brewing Arm. Not only that I knew the owner Rick as a Fat City Records regular from back in the day and he’s a fukin dude. Because it was Rick I knew this gaff was gonna be dope without even lookin but when I finally did see it I couldn’t believe how amazing it was.  After some toing and froing and much love from all three parties the Wet Laser BBQ is born. 

So now all that’s left is to give you the run-down of amazing selectors booked for the event and keep our fingers crossed for the weather.

James Holroyd (Back To Basics / Begin)

Jim or Boggy as he is known to friends is somewhat of a legend and inspiration to many DJ and producer worth his/her salt in Manchester and mucho further afield. Not only is he a great DJ (Defo one of Manchester’s finest), he has impeccable taste in music. The best club journeys are created when selector knowledge and DJ skills collide and Jim has an abundance of both. He has been producing music for years and his latest Begin project has created a string of instant Balearic classic records. Check em out here (Click)

Mikey Donn (Band On The Wall / Krispy)

Again another legend. Mikey is more well known as one third of UK Hip Hop pioneers the Krispy 3 and as a regular spinner on the Reggae and Bashment circuit but not many people realise how good Mikey is spinning Boogie, Disco, Acid House and everything in-between. Anybody who attended the Red Laser BBQ a few years back will remember how he obliterated the gaff!!! This guy is a sick DJ. Check him out here (CLICK)

Randy Marsh (Full Beam / Wet Play)

Full Beam and Wet Play man Marsh jams the boogie like it was his last day on earth. When he aint working on bonkers creations (Red Laser Desk brighteners, Marital Aids, Il Bosco Kemp Folds etc) he’s spinnin boogie down the gravy pit and various underground nights around Manchester. All you style biters bring your note pads and pens as you are sure to hear a whole heap of jams you can rob and claim as your own (Turds). Check his mixes here (CLICK)

DJ sonofapizzaman (Full Beam)

He’s Randy’s DJ partner at Full Beam and an avid collector of boogie and Italo vinyl’s that you aint heard before. Don’t ask him where he got his DJ name from. The clue is in the title you muppet. Top head. Top spinner. Check his mixes here (CLICK)

The Disco Mums (Red Laser)

The toppest bunch of DJ girls in the UK and residents of Red Laser Disco. I aint heard any girl DJ’s that play better choons than these and all vinyl too. Just avoid em when its rag week. They been DJin  together solid for 3 years now so they all come on at the same time. FIYAH!!! Check their mixtapes here (CLICK)

Il Bosco (Red Laser Records / Fat City)

That’s me!
Check me out init – (CLICK)

Metrodome (Red Laser Records / Wet Play)

This cat has so much showbiz talent he shits sequins. Nobody gets lost in the enjoyment of Djin more than Metrodome. Not only that his fukin selections are the bomb. Its always a real treat watchin this guy do his thang. I cant decide if he’s better at DJin or producing. Get the idea here how good this guy is here (CLICK)

Kickin’ Pigeon (Wet Play)

Pidge brings deep house and quality techno knowledge as his specialities but don’t pigeon hole this G. As one of the Wet Play crew he brings amazing eclecticism and is knowledgeable in all genres. As you guessed he’s a brillo DJ (As if we gonna put on anyone shite!!!) and always brings class and surprises to his DJ sets - (CLICK)

The Social Service

The crew that bring Manchester one of the best underground nights in years. They don’t even need to do their thing in the city centre. In fact it’s that good they don’t even do it in a trendy suburb!!! The Social Service jam their shit in Stretford. These guys have a combined record collection of super gems. They DJ with passion and skill and never fail to rock the fukin joint. Check there vibe here (CLICK)

At the time of writing there may be a couple of super special guests in the pipeline. We just finalizing the late night after party sitch so watch the event page for any updates (Event page click here)

Traditionally the BBQ sells out. Admittedly the tickets usually sell out a few days before so no rush (Just don’t forget)

Tickets available here from skiddle (CLICK TO BUY TICKETS)

And from Piccadilly records in Manchester - (CLICK)

So here we have the all new improved BBQ the Wet Laser BBQ happnin in a venue that will blow peoples melons apart. We don’t get paid to do it here! All the love is pumped into makin this an experience for all that attend. And as for Kro Bar, so what I lost my cash cow. Those times were mutually beneficial and really should be the blueprint for all promoters as it’s always less risk for a venue. The BBQ’s at Kro helped me raise the money to start Red Laser Records and paid for a load of expensive B0 posters too. Anyone want any let me know got 10 from each event takin up space in mi garage send a message to redlaserrecords@gmail.com

I got no beef with Kro and the owner Mark I gotta heap of respect for as a straight talkin entrepreneur with his feet on the ground. Anyway for those who missed out on last month’s free promoters spread sheet giveaway click here to download and spread the link to friends who may need assistance in managing their costs (CLICK)

Il Bosco

Thursday, 3 July 2014

BBQ, New Releases, Spread Sheet & Gibberish

Il Bosco has been a busy man over the last 6 months and thinkin bout where to even start with this blog post is difficult. Where does one begin!!!  Well im gonna slip into pro mode style and break out the logic thinkin.

Blog Agenda
  1. Red Laser Releases
  2. Incoming events and DJ gigs
  3. Mancunian Jibberish
  4. Free Download  of all singing all dancing Excel spread sheet for useless promoters
  5. Summary

Section 1 – Red Laser releases

Yeah we been quiet for a while. 6 months from the last release is a bit too long but now the clip is full and we ready to shoot G’s. All releases available here just keep a look out for updates - CLICK HERE TO BUY

First up - Starions – Mindbender EP.

Check this shit. Crystal clear cyber italo and italo boogie jams. This cats like ahead of his time. Your useless mates who are into Lana Del Ray and shop in Urban Outfitters will be bangin on about this shit in 20 years the turds. By that time we gonna be on crazy shit like Autotune Hardcore or summat.  We did 50 only artwork sleeves for this release. We posted on Facebook with the link to buy. Within 3 hours all 50 were gone. SOLD OUT!!!!  The proper release comes out soon in the newly designed Red Laser house jackets. If you want a Starion release and get a beady eye on Discogs and snap before the mega price tags start poppin. But just in case you didn’t know there are 3 uber ultra spezialize test press EP’s with super rare extra goodies available here ONLY – The Pyramid Suite (CLICK HERE)
Next up - Red Laser Records EP 6

4 more tracks curated to express just what goes down in Manchester and gives the true taste of Red Laser. Manchester is a city of music lovers. We don’t give a fuck what anyone else thinks. This is our sound. Starion brings the Italo, Nick Smith brings the Warehouse, LeonxLeon brings the DISCO and Hot Sporran brings the darkness. More details to follow but eben off the test pressings the gang have been dropping the tracks. LeonxLeons track has obliterated a few dancefloors already after DJ Emerald of the Disco Mums taxed it from Red Laser HQ. Again there are 4 uber ultra spezialize test press EP’s with super rare extra goodies available here ONLY – The Pyramid Suite – Click Here MORE DETAILS TO FOLLOW (I just cutted and pasted that line from above. Being lazy. Ope it don’t show)

 More you say - Ste Spandex EP 2

The unmistakable, uncompromising sound of Ste Spandex is back on this 4 track 12” featuring Red Laser regular Sarah Bates. The boogie ethos features heavy on this EP. The test pressings came back the other week but we cut an old version and it had to be redone. New tests back soon but that means theres 4 EP’s with a track that should never have gone on them. I got one. Ste got the rest. RARE SHIT!!! Hunt that fuker down!! Proper release imminent. More info to follow in the coming weeks

EVEN MORE!!!!!!! Fuck yeah!! - Kid Machine – Red Planet EP 

I aint even gonna go on about how good this shit is. All im sayin is – ON CONSTANT REPEAT IN BOSCO’S GAFF – CONSTANT G. This is a fukin heavy heavy heavy heavy heavy EP. More details soon

Surely there can’t be more? Fuck yes, and don’t call me Shirley!


After being dogged with recording and mastering issues we have nearly finished a project that has been 2 years in the making. MORE INFO SOON
Ok that’s the release stuff nailed.

Section 2 – Incoming events. Plenty appnin to us over the next few months but eres the pick

Wet Laser BBQ – Sunday August 24th – First Chop Brewery

After loads of mithering from everyone that went to the Red Laser BBQ’s we goin in for the mega session. Red Laser and good mates Wet Play are doing a joint affair. Just like when all the Power Rangers merge into a massive kick ass G Red Laser and Wet Play will become one huge Mechadisco to slay all discos with weapons of mass vinyl gems complete with Jamaican BBQ scrannage bombs (Jek Chicken and Goat and Akees n stuff). Not even that Mothra could defeat us sonically. Anyway what was fuck was that moth about? If Godzilla had any brains he’d of just rolled up a massive sheet of paper and swotted the cunt. Er,, im digressing. Full line up to be revealed as some of our favourite DJ’s have agreed to play. Things kick off at 3pm outdoors. If the weathers bad it don’t matter. We got a big grotty archway to do our thing under. If its sunny we just step outa the shadow of the arch. Simple!!! Later the event moves into the indoor club space till late. It’s a fantactic place with a fantastic soundsystem so get yer cheap tickets asap. £7 nicker for the first 50 sold then we goin £8 quids. The BBQ’s always sell out. Just sayin!! - GET UR TICKETS HERE

Electric Elephant

If yer out in Croatia come check us. I’m playin with Groove Armarda and the Una Bombers in Barberellas nightclub from 12 – 2 on the Saturday night. If your too mangled to make that then catch me on the main stage on the Sunday from 9pm till 11pm with Darren Green and Ashley Beadle. CLICK HERE FOR DETAILS

Section 3 – Mancunian Jibberish

Shut yuh grid
Do one yuh Bulb
Sort yuh napper out
Fukin leg it
Go fag it
Buzzin tackle
Top jib
Nice one ar kid
Giv a shit
Nar mate
Ava day off
U got the cleanest arse in Manchester. All yuh shit comes outa yuh mouth
Lick u out
Suck ya bulb

Section 4 – Free Un-download of promoter spread sheet - Stop Press!!! I gotta download link - http://we.tl/68DUw522Fp

Here I made this just for all you promoters that are shit with money. Now you can manage your costs and make informed predictions when promoting your next party with the all singin all dancing multi coloured promoter spread sheet. Input  numbers and costs in the boxes lined red. This will update the final totals boxes for you to breakdown yo shit financially. As the p[rofit rises the profit box changes colour from in the Red to in the Green. Use the fucker wisely and you may even make some doe on your next event!!
If you want the spread sheet after the link has run out leave your email address as a comment and i will send it over. Happy forecasting yo

Section 5 – Summary

So now your up to date with all that’s happnin in my world right now. You got the release schedule, you got the event dates, you rockin some faux Manc Jargon and you makin doe with your spread sheet. Look out for Wine reviews “THE SUMMER SPECIAL” comin soon. Stay safe heads

Il Bosco