Monday, 16 September 2013

More Red Laser Releases and Random Shit

Before I start any talk of music there are a couple of things I have to document that my bonce had Eureka moments about

First up – I was asked what book would be a good present for a 4 year old. Without even thinking i said “Anythin with robots or monkeys in” A few days later i was thinkin about why i said that. Then i realized ‘everyone’ likes robots and monkeys not just kids. Ok so why? And then i broke it down Gees.

Robots and monkeys are both intriguingly similar to humans but less boring. Monkeys are amusingly chaotic humans in their pre-historic state that do stuff that we hypocritically criticize them for like pissing on their mates, fuking anything that moves no matter the sex, masturbating for all to see, sniffing bum holes, eating things removed from the body, nicking stuff they cant use and ganging up for a bit of the old ultra violence.  At the opposite end of the scale robots are like nerdy amusingly organised humans in their futuristic state that do stuff we hypocritically criticize them for like not walking properly, being top at maths, not being able to run or swim, always calculating the odds of survival in a “Fuck Yeah” situation, being shit at fighting and not fucking anything cos robots are not sexually attractive therefore cant chat up birds very well. What makes both funny is that they are nearly but not quite us. Thats that cleared up

Next i need to know if theres already some kind of theory that says what we see at an atomic level e.g.  atoms and electrons and other really small shit is just the same as stuff at the other end of the scale e.g. galaxy’s, black holes, stars n stuff but depending in which direction you look it seems really small one way and massive the other making General Relativity and the Standard Model actually the same thing. 4D shit gees. Let me know

 So the Wet Play gang of crazies have WGFM #2 about to drop internationally. #1 is pretty much goneski and for a good reason. The shit is HOT!!! Well it’s the same for #2. Yeah so you only get 2 tracks on this one but the fukers are so large you won’t even be bothered. Money’s worth aint about how many tracks you get for your buck it’s how much quality init. I’d rather have two face melters than 20 ear graters anyday ar kid

Wet Play – Where Good Friends Meet #2

Metrodome – My Way

Who can take a vocal? Speed it up to fuck? Fuel it up with acid and go drop a boogie hook? The Metrodome caaaaaaaan. The Metrodome can cos he mixes it with love and makes yer ears feel goooood. Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzp No shit if you aint down with this sound you need to un-learn what you have learned G. This is a proper face melter! Someone tell  Katie Piper to avoid listening to this track cos she’ll be back to square one!  If for some reason you get puzzled hearing the pitched vocal then go and listen to loads of early 90’s rave. The scnene was massively into this technique.  This is real dance floor disco music. 11 out of ten for my man Metrodome

Ste Spandex – Pardon My Length

Another discoid tape cruncher from Spandex the cassette collector . He’s been hoarding that shit to keep the production line working so theres currently a Scotch VHS drought in Manchester. Shit gets so hot in Spandexys studio we had to send the whole Ferguson Videostar to the mastering guy cos the track melted the eject button. Looped boogie disco bliss in Spandex’s undeniable style. This cat is the producer that just keeps on giving. The more he releases the better it gets and now he’s finally starting to get noticed worldwide. Theres no way lack of journalistic exposure is gonna hold back Spandex’s march on the underground. His production style is unique yet devastatingly effective.

These Wet Play cats also know how to throw a party. Theyz putting on an all out lazer warfare session with Mancunian underground institution Space Docking on September 20th at Soup Kitchen in Manchester’s NQ. Serious underground sounds cookin up ya brain. "CLICK HERE" for event

We are releasing so much stuff in such a short period im not sure what CAT numbers we’re at anymore. Anyway Red Laser EP4 test press just came back too and fuckin WOW!!!!!!! This shit just gets heavier and heavier. Kid Machine and Starion have been working on their debut RL EP’s so this meant there was some room to fill on EP4 and we haven’t been let down. Heres the lowdown peeps

Tony Carrasco presents B.Funk feat Sally O – Who What Where When and Why? (Flemming Dalum Remix)

To say Tony Carrasco is a bit of an italo legend and is a fukin understatement . he is responsible for some of my favourite Italo records producing Klien & MBO, Ameresie, Flash 83, Gaz Nevada, Plastic Mode and BFunk. Then take Red Laser Man and Italo legend Flemming Dalum and stick him on the remix and POW!!!!! The result is one of the heaviest tracks on Red Laser to date. Its like ACR and ESG were thrown in the studio with nothing to eat except E’s. An absolute top draw track

Nick Smith – Neon

So the great thing about the label for me is the natural way things happen. For some reason i havnt had to deal with one knobhead yet which is rare in showbiz. Out of the intaweb blue comes Nick Smith based over in Leeds and responsible for the Clandestino parties with fellow top bloke / Dj producer Joe Morris. When i heard this track i could not believe I had got to it first. Then i realised there aint many organised vinyl labels out there so this is a golden time for people like me. This 8 minute acid chugger will blow the socks off tramp in January. Mindbendingly good

Leon x Leon – 1985

The French beer of choice. No sorry thats 1884. My man in Paris Leon x Leon is another guy who came to my attention through hanging out in the same virtual spaces. Again a pleasure to deal with due to the laid back attitude of people in the Italo and Disco circles. Leon x Leon hits the sunshine button with this steady and beautifully made sunset disco beatdown. It chugs hard, drops euphorically and then builds and builds to its hands in the air finish. 5 star neavuex discoteque  monsieur

Il Bosco (With Ste Spandex on piano) - Hard Shoulder

 Make a beat, drop some analog bassline, sprinkle with synth jizz and get Ste Spandex over to The Nest to jam the piano and hit the record button. Thats how we do it in Manchester yo. No computers were harmed in the making of this track. Cos we smashed them up when i started the label. Spandex works the same way as i do. All live Jams and overdubs. The result was 18 minute track that our mate James Holroyd edited to the 4 minutes of dancfloor Italo heaven. Team Laser in effect. High five init



Il Bosco

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